LOUISVILLE /JEFFERSON COUNTY

DEMOCRATIC PARTY NEWSLETTER

Week of April 10, 2009

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CLICK HERE FOR CURRENT LIST OF EVENTS

Updated on a regular basis

The Louisville/Jefferson County Democratic Executive Committee meets the 4th Wednesday of every month at 5:00 pm at Democratic Headquarters, 640 Barret Avenue .

 

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 We the People" to "King of the World": "YOU'RE FIRED!" ...a letter from Michael Moore

Friends,

Nothing like it has ever happened. The President of the United States, the elected representative of the people, has just told the head of General Motors -- a company that's spent more years at #1 on the Fortune 500 list than anyone else -- "You're fired!"

I simply can't believe it. This stunning, unprecedented action has left me speechless for the past two days. I keep saying, "Did Obama really fire the chairman of General Motors? The wealthiest and most powerful corporation of the 20th century? Can he do that? Really? Well, damn! What else can he do?!"

This bold move has sent the heads of corporate America spinning and spewing pea soup. Obama has issued this edict: The government of, by, and for the people is in charge here, not big business. John McCain got it. On the floor of the Senate he asked, "What does this signal send to other corporations and financial institutions about whether the federal government will fire them as well?" Senator Bob Corker said it "should send a chill through all Americans who believe in free enterprise." The stock market plunged as the masters of the universe asked themselves, "Am I next?" And they whispered to each other, "What are we going to do about this Obama?"

Not much, fellows. He has the massive will of the American people behind him -- and he has been granted permission by us to do what he sees fit. If you liked this week's all-net 3-pointer, stay tuned.

I write this letter to you in memory of the hundreds of thousands of workers over the past 25+ years who have been tossed into the trash heap by General Motors. Many saw their lives ruined for good. They turned to alcohol or drugs, their marriages fell apart, some took their own lives. Most moved on, moved out, moved over, moved away. They ended up working two jobs for half the pay they were getting at GM. And they cursed the CEO of GM for bringing ruin to their lives.

Not one of them ever thought that one day they would witness the CEO receive the same treatment. Of course Chairman Wagoner will not have to sign up for food stamps or be evicted from his home or tell his kids they'll be going to the community college, not the university. Instead, he will get a $23 million golden parachute. But the slip in his hands is still pink, just like the hundreds of thousands that others received -- except his was issued by us, via the Obama-man. Here's the door, buster. See ya. Don't wanna be ya.

I began my day today in Washington, D.C. I went to the U.S. Senate and got into their Finance Committee's hearing on the Wall Street bailout. The overseers wanted to know how the banks spent the money. And many of these banks won't tell them. They've taken trillions and nobody knows where the money went. It certainly didn't go to create jobs, relieve mortgage holders, or free up loans that people need. It was so shocking to listen to this, I had to leave before it was over. But it gave me an idea for the movie I was shooting.

Later, I stopped by the National Archives to stand in line to see the original copy of our Constitution. I thought about how twenty years ago this month I was just down the street finishing my first film, a personal plea to warn the nation about GM and the deadly economy it ruled. On that March day in 1989 I was broke, having collected the last of my unemployment checks, relying on help from my friends (Bob and Siri would take me out to dinner and always pick up the check, the assistant manager at the movie theater would sneak me in so I could watch an occasional movie, Laurie and Jack bought an old Steenbeck (editing) machine for me, John Richard would slip me an unused plane ticket so I could go home for Christmas, Rod would do anything for me and drive to Flint whenever I needed something for the film). My late mother (she would've turned 88 tomorrow if she were still with us) and my GM autoworker dad told me in the kitchen they wanted to help and handed me a check for an astounding thousand dollars. I didn't know they even had a thousand dollars. I refused it, they insisted I take it -- "No!" -- and then, in that parental voice, told me I was to cash it so I could finish my movie. I did. And I did.

So on that March day in 1989, as I was driving down Pennsylvania Avenue, my 9-year-old car just died. I coasted over to the curb, put my head down on the steering wheel and started to cry. I had no money to take it in to be repaired, and I certainly had nothing to pay the tow truck driver. So I got out, screwed the license plates off so I wouldn't be fined, turned my back and just left it there for good. I looked over at the building next to me. It said "National Archives." What better place to donate my dead car, I thought, as I walked the rest of the way home.

Though it wasn't easy for me, I still never had to suffer what so many of my friends and neighbors went through, thanks to General Motors and an economic system rigged against them. I wonder what they must have all thought when they woke up this Monday morning to read in the Detroit News or the Detroit Free Press the headlines that Obama had fired the CEO of GM. Oh -- wait a minute. They couldn't read that. There was no Free Press or News. Monday was the day that both papers ended home delivery. It was cancelled (as it will be for four days every week) because the daily newspapers, like General Motors, like Detroit, are broke.

I await the President's next superhero move.

Yours,
Michael Moore
MMFlint@aol.com
MichaelMoore.com
 

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OFF TO THE RACES
 Watch The Independents, By Charlie Cook

It's hard to write a column about politics these days without coming back to the issue of partisanship. It must be one of the most recurrent themes, if not the most, in American politics today. Last week, the House and Senate passed the 2010 budget without a single Republican vote, while the Pew Research Center released an analysis showing the largest partisan gap in a new president's approval rating in modern times.

President Obama's job approval rating among Democrats in last month's Pew polling was 88 percent, with just 27 percent of Republicans approving. The 61-point gap exceeds that of Presidents George W. Bush (51 points in March 2001), Bill Clinton (45 points in April 1993), George H.W. Bush (38 points in May 1989), Ronald Reagan (46 points in March 1981), Jimmy Carter (25 points in March 1977) and Richard Nixon (29 points in March 1969).* Partisanship is alive and well, even in the era of Obama.

An obvious way of measuring partisanship is in terms of the enormous gap between how die-hard Democrats and Republicans assess political leaders. In the case of President Obama, the difference was night and day in the March Pew poll. (He received a 57 percent approval rating among independents.) Obama got similar numbers in Gallup polling last week, with a 90 percent approval rating among Democrats, 27 percent among Republicans and 60 percent among independents, with a margin of error of +/- 2 percentage points.

But right now, the most germane partisanship is found on Capitol Hill, where party cohesion is running extremely high. Not every important vote has been along party lines, but there have been few defectors for either side. It's important to remember, though, that the partisanship we are seeing has two sides to it. On one side, there are Democrats sticking with Obama at a very high rate, and on the other side, Republicans are staying with their leadership at a similarly high rate. Don't lay all of this on Republicans; both sides are holding firm.

On the GOP side, many of the moderate and swing-district members who would be likely to stray from the party lost re-election in either 2006 or 2008. The remaining Republicans, who fundamentally disagree with much of what Obama and the Democrats are trying to do, are overwhelmingly from safe and very conservative districts.

Then there is the question of those Republicans who have fairly senior committee positions, and whether too much fraternization with the enemy could cost them their ranking slot. Given the magnitude of GOP losses in the last two elections, the remaining GOP members have little tolerance for cavorting with the opposition.

On the Democratic side, one thing Speaker Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif., understands is arithmetic. She and the rest of the Democratic House leadership have worked hard to keep their most endangered members from having to cast ballots that would cost them re-election. They understand that some of these members represent districts that are extremely problematic, with voters that simply would not tolerate a congressman who votes down the line with the Democratic leadership. Those Democrats who needed to vote against the leadership were allowed to. The partisan advantage Democrats hold in the House is sufficient to let conservative members do what is necessary to survive.

When it comes to Obama, however, it's imperative that he keep his approval rating up among independents. With 36 percent of all adults last year identifying themselves as Democrats, he can have the enthusiastic support of every Democrat in the country and still have an approval rating that would be just a bit better than impeachment level. To keep his approval rating in the high 50s and low 60s, a level that maximizes his clout on Capitol Hill and helps him hold the political high ground, Obama needs strong support among independents as well.

In weekly compilations of Gallup's nightly tracking data, with a margin of error of +/- 2 percentage points, Obama has run at 90 percent approval among Democrats, give or take 2 points, each week since taking office. Among independents, he has been running around 60 percent each week. Among Republicans, it has varied from as low as 38 percent to as high as 41 percent, the latter just after taking office and before any meaningful policy decisions were made.

If you're going to watch any specific subgroup, watch the independents. Democrats will stick with Obama no matter what, and most Republicans are out of reach. The game lies with that key group of independent voters.

*Data prior to 1990 is from Gallup.

 

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LABOR -- RIGHT-WING CORPORATE FRONT GROUP LAUNCHES 'NEWS' SITE TO SMEAR EMPLOYEE FREE CHOICE ACT:  Last Friday, the Workforce Fairness Institute launched EFCA Wire,  "a new 'news' site that's totally devoted to making the case against" the Employee Free Choice Act. As The Progress Report has noted, the Workforce Fairness Institute is nothing more than a corporate front group "founded by several longtime Republican operatives," and likely funded by anti-EFCA giants like Wal-Mart and Home Depot. In a recent interview with Fox News's Glenn Beck, one of those operatives -- former Bush and McCain advisor Mark McKinnon -- pushed the line that Employee Free Choice removes the secret-ballot option, a claim that even the conservative Wall Street Journal editorial board has begrudgingly admitted is false. Therefore, it's no surprise that EFCA Wire's main purpose is to promote yet another lie. According to the Washington Post's Greg Sargent, the site will place "a particular emphasis on the damage [the Employee Free Choice Act] would allegedly do the economy." But estimates by the Economic Policy Institute show that Employee Free Choice would actually lead to higher wages, better benefits, and a more productive economy. On its first day, EFCA Wire's blatant dishonesty was already apparent. One prominently placed link boasted, "The Hill: 74% Oppose EFCA." However, The Hill was merely reporting on an anti-EFCA ad touting such skewed numbers. In fact, the most recent Gallup polling reveals that 53 percent of Americans support a law to "make it easier for unions to organize workers" -- which is exactly what the Employee Free Choice Act does.

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Anti-union groups and greedy CEOs are spending millions to block the Employee Free Choice Act.

That's why, with the help of cast members from The West Wing, we've launched the "Faces of the Employee Free Choice Act" campaign: WATCH VIDEO

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If you lost your job today, would you know where to turn for help? The new online Unemployment LifeLine from Working America and the AFL-CIO is a one-stop resource center to guide jobless workers to local services and advice from others coping with unemployment.

YOUR COMMENTS 

Harry and Louise are gone; we are in a Thelma and Louise crisis:
(Bold comprehensive change can not wait)

I am currently in Chicago at a conference of medical informatics, medical providers and IT/IM folks. There have been several sessions in the conference over the past week that have addressed the Obama administration’s investment in medical IT as an integral part of national healthcare reform. Senator Whitehouse (Dem, RI) led an excellent town hall meeting on the status of our current healthcare system in general and the related need for our healthcare information system, records, and delivery system in general to enter the 21st century; the need to establish a results based compensation system that incentivizes prevention, wellness maintenance, patient education, and science based best medical practices as opposed to our procedure and disease profit incentive current model.

Senator Whitehouse likes to say that Harry and Louise are gone; we are in a Thelma and Louise crisis. And the cliff ahead of us, as the Senator went on to explain, that we are all about to drive over together is an unfunded federal mandate of 35 trillion dollars secondary to future obligations for Medicare and run away healthcare cost in general that have failed to deliver results.

Here are the facts:

The U.S. currently spends 2.5 trillion annually (nearly 18% of GDP) on healthcare. This figure, per current trends, is expected to rise to greater than 20% of GDP. And what do we get for this “investment” in healthcare? Well, we get 50 million uninsured and 20 million underinsured (nearly a quarter of our population combined) at risk of bankruptcy for potential medical expenses (half of US bankruptcies in 2005 were secondary to medical bills). And according to 2000 World Health Organization figures, the US Health System ranks 37 out of 191 countries, this despite spending a greater portion of GDP than any other nation. And who are among the countries with bragging rights for exceeding US Healthcare delivery quality, accessibility and results? Colombia comes in at 22nd, Chile at 33rd, and Costa Rica at 36th. And further, we only beat Cuba by two places despite Cuba’s post cold war loss of Soviet subsidies and embargo burdened and isolated economy. And while these are 2000 figures, I do not believe there is any evidence that our system has improved in the interim 9 years.

So what do the patrons of the status quo – (i.e. those whose near theological worship of the omnificent powers of the free market dictates that any government involvement is doomed to fail and is sacrilege) – suggest we do to reduce the cost of healthcare that threatens national bankruptcy and erodes our competiveness in a global market? These “stay the course” folks recommend the following solutions: (1) Continue with an employer based system that will either further burden businesses already at a competitive disadvantage or result in expansion to the ranks of the uninsured as the global market forces more companies to jettison their healthcare commitments to workers. (2) Insist that Medicare and Medicaid compensations to providers be further slashed to reduce costs while forcing more providers to turn away Medicare recipients, thus reducing availability to health care (an attempt to destroy a government safety net from within). (3) Reduce coverage while putting even greater numbers at risk for medical related bankruptcy. (4) Or simply reduce the eligibility numbers and push even greater numbers of the most vulnerable (“preexisting” disease and multiple co-morbidities) into the ranks of the uninsured.

All these options may seem good for business bottom lines, private insures and the ballooning Medicare expenditures over the short run; yet each of these paths will exacerbate a national healthcare system already in crises while expanding the ranks of the uninsured.

Oddly, our first world industrial counterparts spend only 7-8% of GDP for healthcare, while generally provide universal coverage, and generally their healthcare systems rank higher than the US system.

The political right has called for the administration to slow down and "concentrate on the economy first”, as if the economy exists in isolation as a singular autonomous issue, and put on hold other initiatives (healthcare, financial regulatory reform, infrastructure, energy and environmental reform, etc...). I say move quicker and more broadly. The economy can only be temporarily propped up to face a more general collapse in the not too distant future if we do not enact sweeping and holistic reform. The economy and our financial institutions that capitalize a growing economy are failing secondary to failures in governance, oversight and proper regulation, as well as the squeeze on the middle class and industry secondary to an increasingly expensive dysfunctional embarrassment of a healthcare "system" (we do not truly have a system), as well as greed, corruption, and polarization of wealth backed by a regressive tax structure that rewards excess while penalizing work.

Enough! Enough of this right-wing, winners-take-all, lobbyist/ special interest driven destruction of our healthcare system, our economy, and our future. Hopefully this administration can take advantage of the broad crises facing every aspect of our economy, healthcare, infrastructure, and core institutions- now generally recognized by all - to produce a comprehensive redirection for our country.

This administration understands that we need reform on multi-fronts and that all are inter-related. They also understand that they have a short window of opportunity (approximately two years) in which we have the chance to get this down. There is a short window before the downward spiral set in motion by the radical right's agenda of greed, division, and self interest will have exhausted the nation's capacity to make the investments needed for our future; and there is a short window in which this administration's honeymoon and the progressive majority will be in place to allow the swift and transforming comprehensive actions required

As Winston Churchill said, “You can always count on Americans to do the right thing- after they've tried everything else". While not the most flattering assessment of America, at his point I hope that the Prime Minister was correct, I hope it is not too late to do the right thing. Unfortunately, our ability to make the needed investments in "the right thing" has been severely diminished by decades of doing the radical- right's thing to the detriment of us all and the world.

The time is now. The opportunity is fleeting. We must voice our support for this administration and overwhelm the relentless attacks on us all – (an attack on the majority of the American people, the future a relevant and just nation, and a truly representative democratic future) - as orchestrated by Rush Limbaugh, Fox "news", Senator Minority Leader McConnell, House Minority Leader Bonner, and the remaining remnants mouth pieces of the radical right's discredited agenda.

Just a few thoughts from my travels.

Ron Leach
Hardinsburg, KY
 

DAILY GRILL

"Bristol's focus will remain on raising Tripp, completing her education, and advocating abstinence." -- Spokeswoman for Gov. Sarah Palin (R-AK), 4/3/09

VERSUS

"[E]veryone should be abstinent or whatever, but it's not realistic at all." -- Bristol Palin, 2/16/09

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"Dick Cheney is clearly right in saying that between the Court decisions about terrorists and the administration actions the United States is running greater risks of getting attacked than we were under President Bush." -- Former Republican House speaker Newt Gingrich, 4/6/09

VERSUS

"Well, I wouldn't necessarily agree with that. ... We think for the military, in particular that camp, that's a line [torture] that can't be crossed." -- Gen. David Petraeus, 3/29/09, on Cheney's claim

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"We are not a secular country." -- Former House speaker Newt Gingrich, 4/8/09, on Fox News's Sean Hannity show

VERSUS

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof."  -- U.S. Constitution

Quotes of the Day

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Recent Senate Votes 

Concurrent Resolution on the Budget for FY 2010 - Vote Agreed to (55-43, 1 Not Voting)

The Senate passed their version of the national budget for fiscal year 2010.

Sen. Mitch McConnell voted NO
Sen. Jim Bunning voted NO

Recent House Votes 

Generations Invigorating Volunteerism and Education (GIVE) Act - Vote Passed (274-149, 8 Not Voting)

The House agreed to the Senate amendments to this national service bill, sending it to the president.

Rep. Brett Guthrie voted NO

Rep. John Yarmuth voted YES

To amend the executive compensation provisions of the Emergency Economic Stabilization Act of 2008 - Vote Passed (247-171, 1 Present, 12 Not Voting)

On Wednesday, the House passed this bill intended to curb bonuses of executives at financial institutions that receive Troubled Asset Relief Program money.

Rep. Brett Guthrie voted NO

Rep. John Yarmuth voted YES

Family Smoking Prevention and Tobacco Control Act - Vote Passed (298-112, 21 Not Voting)

The House passed this bill that would give the FDA regulatory authority over tobacco, but would not allow the agency to ban cigarettes or other tobacco products.

Rep. Brett Guthrie voted NO

Rep. John Yarmuth voted YES

Congressional Budget for Fiscal Year 2010 - Vote Passed (233-196, 3 Not Voting)

The House passed their version of the national budget for fiscal year 2010.

Rep. Brett Guthrie voted NO

Rep. John Yarmuth voted YES

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RIGHT-WING FEARMONGERING: Predictably, the right wing immediately seized upon the missile launch to fearmonger. On Friday, former U.N. ambassador John Bolton intoned, "A ballistic missile that can reach the United States, can easily reach Japan, is a substantial threat." On Fox News Sunday, the Weekly Standard's Bill Kristol, Gov. Mark Sanford (R-SC), and former House speaker Newt Gingrich all agreed that, as Kristol put it, "We can't tolerate these North Korean launches," and the U.S. must "act accordingly." However, last week he called for "preemptive actions" against North Korea -- possibly with lasers of some kind -- Gingrich was vague on exactly how he would go about it. "There are three or four techniques that could have been used, from unconventional forces to standoff capabilities, to say we're not going to tolerate a North Korean missile launch, period," he blustered. The National Review's Rich Lowry indicated that America's only option was to "develop a robust missile defense" and lamented that the "Obama administration is falling down" in that respect by possibly giving up a missile defense site in Eastern Europe. Gingrich and Kristol even used the test to beat the war drums for their favored target: Iran. "This test, in a sense, is a de facto Iranian test, and it makes more immediate the threat of the North Korean and Iranian nuclear programs," Kristol said. On Twitter, Gingrich referred to the "north korean-iranian missile launches," adding, "We know they work together. Is this launch a dual threat?"

RADICAL RIGHT: RIGHT WING'S FALSE CLAIMS THAT OBAMA WILL TAKE AWAY GUNS 'HAS HELPED FUEL THE PANIC BUYING OF FIREARMS': On Saturday in Pittsburgh, a gunman wearing a bulletproof vest opened fire on police officers who were responding to a domestic disturbance call, killing three of them. Many bloggers have noted that the shooter, 23-year old Richard Poplawski, irrationally feared for "the Obama gun ban that's on the way" and "didn't like our rights being infringed upon." In a presciently-timed op-ed, New York Times columnist Charles Blow warned of the disturbing escalating rhetoric of right-wingers like Chuck Norris, Michele Bachmann, Glenn Beck, and others. Blow writes, "They're [conservatives] apocalyptic. They feel isolated, angry, betrayed and besieged. And some of their 'leaders' seem to be trying to mold them into militias. ... At the same time, the unrelenting meme being pushed by the right that Obama will mount an assault on the Second Amendment has helped fuel the panic buying of firearms. According to the F.B.I., there have been 1.2 million more requests for background checks of potential gun buyers from November to February than there were in the same four months last year. That's 5.5 million requests altogether over that period; more than the number of people living in Bachmann's Minnesota." The chart accompanying Blow's column shows the recent surge in interest in gun ownership quite clearly.
 

 
Think Fast  

A coalition of corporate lobby and trade groups, including the U.S. Chamber of Commerce and the Business Roundtable, are increasing their efforts to block an "Obama administration proposal to raise taxes on overseas profits." Proponents of the Obama plan argue that current tax law "encourages American multinationals to add facilities and jobs overseas rather than expanding back home."

Today, Secretary of Defense Robert Gates will "propose cuts or delays in weapons programs in an effort to rein in defense spending that has risen 72 percent since 2000." In response, major defense contractors have been increasing their lobbying efforts in Washington in an attempt to “preserve their programs."

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is arming her diplomatic efforts with a new set of tools including Facebook, text messaging, and YouTube. The State Department has hired a new staffer whose job will be to "blend technology with diplomacy in an attempt to help solve some of the globe’s most vexing problems on health care, poverty, human rights and ethnic conflicts."

Former Cuban leader Fidel Castro said yesterday that Cuba "does not fear dialogue" with the U.S. and praised Sen. Richard Lugar (R-IN) "for calling for a new U.S. policy of engagement” with Cuba. "We don't fear dialogue…[n]or do we need confrontation to exist, as some fools think," Castro wrote in an internet column. Dialogue "is the only way of procuring friendship and peace between peoples," he said.

Since his stints as a plumber, war correspondent, economist, and anti-labor crusader have had only mixed results, Samuel Joseph Wurzelbacher is taking up a new cause: abolishing the IRS. In a video at IRSvote.com, Wurzelbacher says, "I'm here to ask my fellow Americans to join me to make this the last year we ever have to file a tax return. I'm going to give the American people the opportunity to vote the IRS out." Visitors can then "vote via the Internet, or by sending a text message or making a phone call to a 900 phone number. However, the site warns that they will be charged 99 cents a vote."

Two-thirds of Americans approve of President Obama's job performance, a New York Times/CBS News poll finds. "By contrast, just 31 percent of respondents said they had a favorable view of the Republican Party, the lowest in the 25 years" of the poll. Sixty-three percent thought Obama was most likely to make the right decisions for the economy, versus 20 percent who said Congressional Republicans were more likely.

The poll also indicates that "almost three-quarters of Americans think it is a good idea to raise taxes on people making more than $250,000 per year."

Shortly after throwing out the first pitch at the Yankees-Orioles Opening Day game yesterday, Vice President Biden "went up to the announcers booth and brought the house down, poking fun at the anonymity of his office, mocking his own baldness, and making a well-timed joke about former V.P. Dan Quayle’s failures as a speller." When the announcers told the Vice President that he was handling his job well, Biden jokingly replied, "No one ever remembers your name. It's okay."

Energy Secretary Steven Chu said yesterday that the U.S. should invest in so-called "clean coal" technology. "It absolutely is worthwhile to invest in carbon capture and storage because we are not in a vacuum," Chu said, adding that even if the U.S. and Europe move away from coal, "India and China will not." "Quite frankly," he said, "I doubt if the United States will turn its back on coal."

Al Franken (D) "extended his lead over former Sen. Norm Coleman (R) in the ongoing Minnesota Senate recount on Tuesday," increasing his winning margin to 312 votes. "There are still legal issues to be resolved in recount court, but Coleman can no longer gain enough votes to overtake Franken." Yesterday, Sens. Chuck Schumer (D-NY) and Robert Menendez (D-NJ) called on Coleman to concede.

On a "mostly party-line 46-53 vote," the Virginia General Assembly "rejected $125 million in federal stimulus money Wednesday that would have provided additional unemployment benefits to thousands of jobless Virginians." Gov. Tim Kaine (D) was "visibly angry" after the vote. Virginia's unemployment rate is at 6.6 percent.

A coalition of liberal groups called Health Care for America Now (HCAN), which includes the AFL-CIO, Campaign for America’s Future, and MoveOn.org, is "waging a national grassroots campaign this week to demand that all Americans be given access to government-run public health insurance plans." They are also pushing centrist senators like Evan Bayh (D-IN) to allow health care legislation to pass through budget reconciliation.

HUMOR

"President Obama met the Queen of England, and gave her an iPod as a gift. When British Prime Minister Gordon Brown was here, Obama gave him a DVD box set. So, it looks like he's saving the big gift, the Nintendo, for the Pope." --Jay Leno

"President Obama left for Europe today for a meeting with the major world economic powers known as the G-20. Or as they're called now, 'the Chapter 11.'" --Jay Leno

"Fox News launched a new editorial website today that is based solely on reporters' opinions, not on the facts of the stories themselves. They're calling the site Fox News." --Jimmy Fallon

"President Obama guarantees that if you buy a G.M. or Chrysler product and they don't survive, they will back your warranty. Well, that's great news for consumers. Combine the efficiency of the Federal government with the honesty of car mechanics." --Jay Leno

"So, it's pretty crazy. Look, we're bailing out Wall Street, we're bailing out banks, we're bailing out car companies. In fact, did you know there's a special box on your tax form this year you can check if you want a portion of your taxes to actually go to running the government?" --Jay Leno

"It's a great day for our president, Barack Obama, who got to meet the Queen of England today. She very regally gave him a photograph of her, and he gave her an iPod! That's quite an unusual gift from the President. Usually he gives out about $150 million." --Craig Ferguson

"I think Obama will have a great time in London. It's a lovely place. I used to live there. There are 12 million people in London and about 500 teeth." --Craig Ferguson

"Hey, happy birthday, former Vice President Al Gore, who is 61 years old. And besides being Al Gore's birthday, it is also the 116th anniversary of the invention of the zipper, both of which played a major role in the Clinton Administration." --Jay Leno

"Hey, you hear about this? A voice from the past, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, who may run for president in 2012, that's the rumor, has converted to Catholicism. So after a number of affairs, two divorces, and three marriages, how would you like to get stuck behind him for that first confession, huh?" --Jay Leno

"But this is a fascinating story. This C.E.O. at General Motors, largest corporation in the world, most powerful corporation in the world and they said, 'Okay, you know, we'll do business with you guys, but you, take a hike.' But they gave him $20 million to step down. And I'm thinking well, we should have tried that on Bush." --David Letterman

"By golly, you know what it is? April Fool's Day. Happy April Fool's Day, everybody. It is crazy when you think about it. Bush has only been out of office 10 weeks and he already has his own national holiday." --David Letterman
 

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INTERESTING  

Buy American Mention of the Week, By Roger Simmermaker      

GOOD NEWS

The Obama administration said yesterday that the U.S. would join Britain, France, Germany, Russia, and China in talks with Iran regarding its nuclear program -- a further step toward direct American engagement with Iran.

VIDEOS  

None this week

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CLICK HERE FOR LATEST ISSUE OF THE "FRIDAY ALERT"

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